Frustration

Feel a need to post a blog. For the life of me I do not know what to say. I've traveled the World Wide Web and there seems little move of God. Oh, yes there are mentions, and very good intentions, but for the most part when I find God on the www it is to promote this and that. 

I chuckle now at myself because I need to ask, "Is that not what I appear to be like?" I suppose so. So in reality those people mentioning God in sincerity, are walking the road I am.

I know my heart and the only other one that knows it is my Lord. I am sure He can see frustation that has caused me in the past to throw up my hands and say, "It can not be done!" 

I remember in Nashville, when I was faceing these same thoughts, the Lord 'said', "Tell me about it brother!" 

I tell you there are times that the Lord 'blows me away' with that kind of love! I am in no way deserving of it, but when He 'said', "brother" I was blown away. 

So I keep going. No way can I make an excuse to throw up the hands now and say, "Enough!" I am thinking more and more this walk is into eternity. 

Feeling I have in the past brought some along this life into eternity. With all my desire I want to bring multitudes!!! In Christ it can be done and only in Christ. God says it, I believe it, done deal!

Pray the Lord it so!

Growing Patient

Second half of my Nashville experience coming up. Heading down for GMA Music week. Extreme Tours will be promoting me. Workshops to attend and all this very new kind of stuff to me.
Feel very strongly that the Lord has me here. Growing to learn what patients is. Seeking nothing but what the Lord will get out of what I do for Him. Maybe that is a "big head" sounding thing, I know what I mean.
Easy to say, "I will die for the Lord", harder to do. Easy to say, "I am going to live for the Lord", maybe even harder to do! That though is the road I would like to walk.
I know it is only done in the will of God and in His strength. That is my prayer, I would hope that I may hear "murmirs of prayer" asking God for the same for me.
My ultimate desire is for this to be all over with and so my ministry verse is Romans 11:15! Let now the Lord's dealing with the Gentiles end, and the clock begin to tick for your people Israel again!
Look up for "your redemption comes on clouds of glory"
Amen

A Rooster Crows

It was a few years ago I made and effort to get back into fellowship with the Lord. I went to church (a different one then mine) but a Pastor I knew. While there I tried to serve the Lord again too. However be it I did not want to do what the Lord would have me do, or because of a difficult passage I knew in the Bible, I fell away again.
Recently, I sought the Lord again knowing that this section of scripture would haunt me. I knew though that I could not let that stand in my way and had to begin to come to the Bible with it is inspired and our only revelation of the one true God it did not need to be inerrent. In fact if thought to be inerrent, our faith would not be "faith" but based on the absolute of the Bible, and our object of faith would be the Bible, and not Jesus the Lord. I hope you follow me.
Anyway the scripture that gave me trouble were the passages of Peter's denial in all four gospel accounts. In three it is stated that the roster would not crow till he denied three times. In Mark it says that it would crow twice before he denied three times.
However after the first denial a rooster crowed in Mark's account. That makes the perdiction of the other three accounts incorrect!
What I came up with (I am not a Greek languge professor or such) hoping that it works out in the indefinate and definate articules, that it was not two crows of a single rooster, but one crow each of two roosters.
For now that works for me, however I still see a danger in teaching the Bible to be inerrent. I would not want though to throw someones seeking faith away on that doubt of mine.

While I was sleeping

There is a famous quote. I am not sure who by, or it's exact wording but it says to the effect, "The only way for evil to prevail is for good people to do nothing. Which had me think of this parable.
Mathew 13: 24-30. Another parable put he forth unto them, saying, The kingdom of heaven is likened unto a man which sowed good seed in his field: But while men slept, his enemy came and sowed tares among the wheat, and went his way. But when the blade was sprung up, and brought forth fruit, then appeared the tares also. So the servants of the householder came and said unto him, Sir, didst not thou sow good seed in thy field? from whence then hath it tares? He said unto them, An enemy hath done this. The servants said unto him, Wilt thou then that we go and gather them up? But he said, Nay; lest while ye gather up the tares, ye root up also the wheat with them. Let both grow together until the harvest: and in the time of harvest I will say to the reapers, Gather ye together first the tares, and bind them in bundles to burn them: but gather the wheat into my barn.

This lead me to think of all the times I was out of fellowship with the Lord. Whether I had been far away from doing what He wanted from this His servant, or just on a prolonged "coffee break" I was not doing what He desired of me. During that time I think you could say I was sleeping.
It just hit me recently, having gotten back in fellowship, all the oppurtunities I gave the enemy to sow his seed while this good person did nothing, or while this Christian slept!

Like a new born babe stepping out of the womb

Eve of my trip to Nashville. 53 Years old. Became a Christian at the age of 26. 11 years later God the Holy Spirit, through the preaching of the word at an evening service at my church, called me to a music ministry. Told me to go ahead and write for Him, basicly.
3 Chord music man, timid performer in the vein of a Timothy, and yet with out doing anything, but post my songs on MySpace and Soundclick, Zach Vierra and Austin Cook contact me for Extreme Tour and BandWithaMission respectively. (A&R guys)
Well I had been honeing my skill on a site called ChristianSongWriter.org (seemed a lot of adds for .org) and the critiques were, "Sounds like Dylan" So my response, "You are what you eat" and "I'm not sure if that is a blessing or a curse"
Bottom line is I really do not know what that critique says anyway. I mean what does Dylan sound like, and does he sound like that to everyone.
All other critiques were about production. I argueed production is not my cup of tea but this is a "Song" writer forum.
No one really got it.
Not to toot my own horn, but one kind lady pointed out to me the real problem which even now I have a hard time digesting, but I can see how maybe she is right.
She said, "They can't say anything good about your work because they are jealous, and see how short they fall"
So here I am going to Nashville. Was turned down for Extreme Tour 2009 and rightly so I think now, though I did come close to making the cut.
I guess what I am babbling about is this is the Lord's work. This is His message. This is the way He wants to tell it. I am pretty confident that if you were to ask the NewsBoys or Steven Curtis Chapman why they are doing what they do? it is because God told them to do it, and they have that calling behind the work. Like I said, it is the Lord's work and it is His message. Like a preacher preaches because God told him to. You do not set out and say I'm going to do this, you set out in the Christian faith doing what God tells you to do. It is not a little thing if God tells you to stay at home and raise children or rise at 3 am to pick up the trash the neighbor put out to the curb. It is a big thing whatever God ask you to do!

"Not Now"

Sad news, but really not unexpected. In fact it seems the very right response.
I have been sitting back in awe of God for what He has done in His ministry through me in Music. I have known how "green" I am. To recieve this response to my submittion tells me I am indeed on the road God wants me on, and eager to see what is around the next bend!
I am going to be in Nashville for BandWithaMission showcase on the 6th, and for the "Objective" my seat is already reserved.
I plan after posting this to contact Ted Bruun about my desire for the second oppurtunity offered here. Indeed too, I do not see me not submitting next year for the Tour. Lord willing. To God be the glory!

First Reviewed: February 03, 2009 Status: Not Selected
Updated On: April 02, 2009

Response: Thanks for your submission. Here is the bottom line after our panel had listened to your music: We liked your music, and believe you have potential. You actually were in a pool of artists that we almost selected for this Summer's tour, and we believe are only going to get better and that we would like to have with us in the future. This year was not possible though due to the number of artists that applied. There simply were other bands from your genre that we felt were a better fit at this time, at the level they are currently at. However, Extreme Tour Events has some other projects coming up that we may be able to use you for. We have added your EPK to the list of artists we will consider for those opportunities. We will contact you in the near future should we decide to use you for those events. Thank you again for your application. We also have decided that we would like to assist you in your development if you will allow us to. We would like to make an investment in you as we believe that we may in fact reap the benefits of that investment when we potentially have you with us in the future. If you feel led, we would like to develop long term relationship with you, and we would like to serve you by assisting you through the contacts and relationships we have developed within the Industry over the years. With this in mind, We have secured a couple of opportunities for you. We have secured invitations for you to participate in two different workshops and development sessions with our Industry Associates and friends. Both of these opportunities are highly valuable. The first is during the GMA Music Week Workshop we are doing for bands that we did select. This event is called The Objective. The Objective event will feature consultation and teaching from some of the biggest and most influential people in the Christian Music Industry. We would like to offer you seats at that closed door session as well as having offered them to the artists that we did select. This event will be held in Nashville, Tennessee, and will be on April 21st, at Michael W. Smith's Rocketown Facility. There is no charge to participate, and you may have already been contacted and may have secured seats. If you have not yet secured seats, and would like to, please e-mail us at _________ with your RSVP, along with the number of seats you will need. The second opportunity we would like to include you in if you desire is a longer session that our selected artists have been invited to, also in Nashville, being held at the end of the Summer when the tour ends. This workshop and by invitation seminar will also be attended by the A&R staff of most of the major labels. You will have the opportunity to showcase for these folks, guaranteed, and you will receive consultation feedback from them after your performance as well as the opportunity to build your own relationship with these folks, which may develop into even more opportunities for you down the road. There is a cost for this second opportunity so that the venue can be paid for that you will showcase in. Please let me know if you want to RSVP for that event. You need to RSVP for this by no later than the end of July. What I would recommend is that you participate in both opportunities. Attend the Objective and receive the advice from our Industry friends that will help you develop over the Summer. Then, at the end of the Summer, having applied that advice, attend this other invitation only workshop and showcase and perform for these folks again. Let's see where that takes you. Just please keep us in mind and set time aside for us in the future as you develop. We look forward to working with you as you develop, and we hope you remember us when you indeed have graduated to the next step in your Calling and career, We would ask you to keep us appraised of the development of your music and career. We would like to consider you for next year's tour possibly as we believe you will probably only develop and improve. So, this is not a no, it's a "not now". Please do stay in touch. I will watch for your response regarding these other opportunities. Ted Bruun, and the Extreme Tour Team